Sucker Punch

Occasionally one has an aha moment, an epiphany, where the world stands still and ideas collide like atomic particles to form a new thought. I had that moment years ago when contemplating sandwiches. Extra chunky peanut butter. Hamburger.

Extra chunky peanut butter on a hamburger?

Well, the answer was: win. most. delicious. sandwich. ever.
Sorry Kung Pao Chicken, you are no longer the best meat and nut combo in my mouth ever.

I understand that most of you, dear readers, are possibly not in agreement.
In fact, even if you like both peanut butter (I refer only to extra crunchy or chunky, never creamy) and hamburgers, you most likely can taste a little bit of bile in the back of your throat and are thinking something like… “that is so gross on so many levels and I hate that you introduced the concept of combining meat and nuts into my once safe and happy world/mouth.“
However there is one of you who is intrigued.
And you will try it.
And you might just love it too.
[Hello Seattle!]

Sucker Punch, by Zack Snyder, is not my extra chunky peanut butter hamburger (His Dawn of the Dead remake might be though).
Actually I was taken to see it on opening night in Manhattan by Jeffrey, who indicated that I would like it since I enjoyed 300.

My vocal response when asked to go was “yes,” but my mental response went something like… “yes, but 300 had 300 half-naked menfolk prancing about doing manly things like killing wolves and fighting off the sexually ambiguous and multi-cultural bad guy from Stargate to prove their hetero-Caucasian manliness (which I found upsetting due to my love of any wolf-like creatures and Stargate, but could overlook due to the 300 half-naked hot man component) and Sucker Punch has half a dozen half-naked teenage girls prancing around doing manly things like killing dragons. And I like dragons, but not so much half-naked teenage girls…

In fact that combination (dragons and half-naked girls) is likely to give me hideous flashbacks to junior high gym class.“

But I saw it, with the 10 other totally amped opening-night moviegoers.
It was no extra chunky peanut butter hamburger.
But it wasn’t so bad.

It definitely didn’t elevate the art form. It was more of an extended music video. I liked the sound track and there was lots to look at. The plot was not as confusing or complicated as everyone keeps saying (movie reviewers might be kinda dumb if they didn’t get it). Plus Scott Glenn was in it and his voice is so dreamy. It is like the aural equivalent of extra chunky peanut butter, rough and smooth and it sticks in your head for a bit…

Anyway, the movie did attempt to combine Nazi steam-punk zombies, ninjas, dragons, and emo girls together in an ultra-melodrama with very little character development and the usual girl-power/misogyny that is de rigueur in most male directed movies featuring a young primarily female cast these days. It was the movie I imagine R Kelly would make if he was a white hipster.

That being said, I am certain that this is the movie equivalent of a creamy peanut butter hamburger, not quite right for me, but there is someone this movie is made for, and they will love it.